I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
Did you know Kal Penn works at the white house? That's almost white castle.
Apparently I signed "I love you" on my bar tab last night.
I'm so high that a hulu ad convinced me to go on healthybaby.com
You told me you were allowed to keep eating butter because it had just passed midnight and you were on the next day's daily fat servings
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
I'm voting my liver organ of the month. The award ceremony is next weekend.
Just walked in on my older brother getting a bj. He told the girl to "keep going" and then attempted to high five me
btw theres a pine tree in the downstairs shower. the guys thought it would be a great free air freshener.
Sorry I don't make house calls. You wanna get blown you come over here. It's like rock paper scissors but vagina ALWAYS beats penis
I'm instituting a new rule. If you wake me up at 3am about wrinkled blankets, I get to throat punch you
she just nodded and said "yeah, I'd fuck him for a reese's peanut butter cup". it's so nice to know I'm not the biggest whore living here
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
I'll give you some leg action but I'm not showing you anything else until your penis admits it loves me
Wow you are like a taller more attractive sex Yoda.
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