My cock was attacked by outdoor plants
remind me tomorrow that nothing happen between me and the guy who's shirt i'm wearing
I just found 51 cents in my bed. Did you leave me a tip?
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
I mean, how many people can say they helped surgically remove something from their body? Other than the guy that got his hand stuck under a rock and cut it off. Doesn't count
the problem with having sex for lunch when its 98 degrees outside is that I can't tell if its sweat or semen running down my leg as I walk back in the office
We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
Duh.
im actually trying to see how many sex dolls we need for our raft so we can stay buoyant while we attack kayakers
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
Decided to make myself tequila gummy bears but got impatient and just drank the bowl of tequila.
your girlfriend showed us your homemade porn last night.
the fact that you trapped hornets in a mailing tube to put in his mailbox does not surprise me sadly.
She's the prison bitch to my Martha Stewart.
It's difficult to focus on bonds when you know your classmate peed in your mouth
Randomize
