remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
so you masturbated because Oprah told you?
He had one of those small greek statue penises
okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.
People were autographing me. I'm like the spring break yearbook
I wasn't interested in him...but then he played The Office theme song on acoustic guitar. I'm sorry.
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
You need to get here now. Before they realize I'm not puerto rican.
ok. can u leave the new roommate a list of instructions for me? like what i need to be fed and when i need to be exercised?
Corn dogs constantly. And all.the time
Random question, but did I leave a spoon on your dresser last night?
Apparently it's illegal to hit pedestrians with coke cans... But the cop complimented my arm. That's a win in my book.
He was 6'8" - I shit you not! He sat up in my bed and the ceiling fan got him right in the forehead.
I drank beer out of a Frisbee and it was all downhill from there...
I will not abuse the gift that was given to me
You were given a vagina and you abuse that pretty hard
Apparently during my blackout I walked over to Troy, grabbed my crotch, and said “Eat Fresh” while his GF was with him. FML
Randomize
