were having a shit on karen session at work but then she walked in so we used code names instead and she tried to join in like she knew them
she just fell off the couch. onto a bag of pretzels. her face resembled a cat that just swallowed a sock.
I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
You told her the u were going to wrap your dick around her neck and start her like a lawn mower. thats why she left.
I didnt realize my nipple ring fell out until he coughed it up.
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
Ya, found out why there were rat traps in my bed. Guess I pissed in Sams room so he went to the store and got them and put them on my bed and put tabasco in his humidifier and put it in my room
You grinded on me in Jimmy johns to a madonna song.
IT'S A HOLY FESTIVAL. A BUDDHIST CELEBRATION OF PENIS.
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
His flight is delayed. Mother Nature is delaying me from sex.
It's 7:30pm and we've already lost someone and had to run from the cops. What the fuck did you put in the punch?
We broke my graduation cords last night when we used them to tie each other up during sex last night
What! I said that you would fall in love? See I know better. Dark liquor makes me think everything is a dream. I barely remember saying that
The career specialist read an Onion article to us. Please send help.
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