My 12 y/o god son's bandmate just asked me to their school dance. Still he's a better catch than the last one...
I literally just watched a girl motorboat herself
You going to midnight mass? we need a dd
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have started doing my homework in bars. It just feels right.
how are you gonna miss the world cup? other than the olympics it's our last way to assert our dominance over China after this economic bull shit
She said her hobbies include bangin guys on one night stands and then sending them facebook relationship requests the next morning just to freak em out
Good thing I took the morning after pill cuz I pretty much had packaged seamen in me like I was a squirrel saving it for later or something
He is so pussy whipped she has made him change his name to Toby
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up with a thorn in my belly button. A THORN!
I've got your keys and your panties. You can have one back. Your play honeybuns.
The boob job was worth every penny just to see the expression of pure joy on his face the first time he saw them.
Upon further investigation my nipples are bruised and I have teeth marks all over.
Yes. With one-hundred percent positivity I can say yes, I do not want you covered in waffles and syrup when I come home.
Fuck him. He can bang that skeezer all he wants. Fuck her lawyerness I’m a YouTube star
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