So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
I sat down with you and helped you write your will last night. I was THAT convinced that you weren't waking up.
He just kept pointing to each of us saying "arrested, arrested, arrested"
Sorry for drunk singing "love hurts" to you at 3 am.
She told me that when she orgasms she just lays there like that baby from teenmom. Who the fuck says that
There's a black statue of liberty dancing on the side of the road. Please hold while I join him.
I wish there was an emoji to express our Eskimo Brothership
Hey! I need booze. And penises. And a lot of mistakes that I will regret in the morning.
I had tater tots and weed with a stripper at 4am who compared the size of my boob to her head because fuck you my life rocks
Yup, found the vomit in the side compartment. My bad.
I'm just gonna put on a documentary and throw up
Yeah you were fine except for when you peed under the bar
I absolutely love waking up to see my phone search history is "xj" "qj" "cj" "uj" and "kj"
She said to call her, so I called her. Her boyfriend answered and traced the fucking call. I could litterally hear him yell because it turns out he lives in 4d
Don't you live in 4c?
Randomize
