shaved balls and baby powder=awesome
I'm ready for this little girl to leave so I can hit the bong already
I took the chef home. His dick even tasted like garlic
i found two dead squirrels on my front step this morning.. do you think they have something to do with my missing phone?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
it's only monday and im already failing all my classes. i give up. tequila tuesday is my only friend.
You mAke me stone. Stone fuck fucking stoned. I'm an stoned you cuz now fucking stoned stoned fucking stoned I stone.
My sharpie cut off line was invaded last night. Where's my turtleneck?
MY MOM IS GOING TO SMOKE WITH ME.
SHE'S GOING TO SMOKE HIGH QUALITY MARIJUANA WITH ME.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i was trying to figure out what "tidy fucking" was when i realized he meant "titty fucking" and i need to start banging smarter people....
In the liquor store when a straight girl and a gay guy were just arguing about who hooked up with the same guy first.
Blacking out is all I've done this year and we're only 3 days in. Checkmate bitch.
Fuck you. You were a total asshole last night.
We will get to that, but can anybody tell me whose fucking socks I am wearing?!
You put THAT much Jager in me and expect me to realize when things are a bad idea?
Regardless I WANT TO BE YOUR SEX DISPENSARY. that is like the career I was born for.
Randomize