i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
Capitaan dildo arrescate!
I think I'm going to postpone my photo shoot until my Gpa dies. I don't want to be in lingerie and stripper heels when I finally get the call
We thought she was passed out on the toilet, but she raised her head to tell me the word I couldn't remember was "empathize." Then she puked blood and passed out.
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
possibly one of my favorite moments was wiping it off your nose after you high fived a bouncer
Who knew there were so many rules and judgements about laying on a kitchen floor. I'm all like I'm resting. It just happens to be on a kitchen floor.
I have good news and bad news. Bad news, she's not in porn. Good news, I found porn.
Just taxi'd to the airport holding a zip lock bag of my own vomit. Bachelorette success.
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
Apparently i'm now known as the kid who was double fisting tequila and pedialyte.
Just woke up beside some twink in a kilt.. how is your sunday going
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
Randomize
