did you wind up at some random place? and do you remember face planting into the fireplace?
Omg. Just talked to a semi driver from nebraska. Got her truck stuck. Gave her and her riding buddy a glass of vodka and a cig. YES.
Fyi: he's overweight and balding. My biological clock is ticking so loud I can't hear the TV.
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My cousin just asked what abortion is. Happy Holidays.
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
Let me just say....i'm sorry about setting your carpet on fire. I had no idea that the paper towel would burn that quickly.
There is a contact in my phone named "Bar Mcntysu." this is why we need a third person to go out with us.
Shitshow foam night was such a success
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
Batteries died. I don't care that you're studying for the bar. Come over. Bring the law books and study after. I'll even make coffee.
I'm all set for mothers day, I let her beat me in beer pong.
He woke me up because I was snoring and went for a second round. First time I'm happy that I snore
He came into my room last night and started peeing underneath my desk, I told him the bathroom was the next door over.
oh man there are to hot chicks wrestling in a pool of maple syrup. ill send you a picture
this is why i will never break up with you
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