Dude if you're in another zip code it doesn't count
You don't understand. I'm not like you.
He just told me he would murder a thousand dolphins to be with me. Quite the charmer.
my periods are so regular now that they are sync-ed with my subscriptions of vogue.
i decided i am going on the Justin Bobby plan for success. Don't cut my hair for a year, don't shave for a month, land Audrina Patridge. Game on.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
what date should I let him know how fucked up I am?
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
xanax give me strength to not ask where we stand with booty calls
Wow. The LSU Tennessee game is on here and the LSU cheerleaders are stupid hot. Its weird having a hard on. At a bar. On a Wednesday. By yourself.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
especially when i'm drunk. his dick might as well be made of cotton candy.
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
Trust me. My dick only does selfies for you.
I didn't even get crazy off of the coke so everything's fine. Also, I think I might have killed my aunt's dog..
DO NOT PREHEAT THE OVEN THIS MORNING! WE STARTED USING IT AS A WINE STASH AROUND MIDNIGHT.
it's your last night here, let's make it one we may or may not remember.
Randomize