Sponge bath it is.
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
And then somehow we were arguing over how to fold our arms
I'm finding that as the end of the quarter approaches, the list of things I refuse to do sober keeps getting longer.
I'm sorry I put you in the washing machine. I honestly thought you would fit.
IM A DRUNK BIRTHDAY CLEOPATRA MESS. CELEBRATE THAT BITCH
I've been at work 30 min broke a paper towel holder a chair set a box on fire and fell down twice. Hungover Brian just reached a new level
He should just accept that I want his dick and his friendship. Can't he understand that I don't do emotions?
Gonna be hard to top last New Year's Eve when the guy I blew came at midnight
Just remember, it's never too late to make a porno
NO ITS THAT IM A SEXUAL DEVIANT AND CANT FILTER MYSELF
was that the third sophomore you've banged this week?
third one in three days
I'm, like, this 🤏🏼 close to buying crocs
And you're also 🤏🏼 to never putting your dick inside me again
Randomize
