Would it be quicker to bike the freeway home?
the cops didnt even say happy birthday to me :(
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
He kept singing "who's that peekin in my window" we thought he was high til we realized someone was lookin in the windows.
Then he told me he was proud of me for remembering that i blew him that night.. Maybe my drinking is getting out of hand.
I am now trying to reassure her that she doesn't have a wide-set vagina. So thanks, for whatever you said.
Yeah. Rock bottom was him passing out and saying "are you putting a condom on me?" and me covering his mouth and saying shhhhh
Pretty sure I scared him off for good. The lesbian in me is ecstatic.
Woke up to my asscrack filled with melted Reese's Pieces. Halloween parties are so weird here man
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
Question: When you have the names of 4 guys tattoo'd on you, how do you make the 5th one real special?
When the stripper from this weekend is your cashier at Publix the next day 😐💀#pensacolaproblems
You walked in on us hooking up, hugged me, high fived him and unhooked my bra.. You claimed to be helping
I'm telling you, I 'm beginning to think that my vagina is magical.
Sorry I bailed on you yesterday. I was propositioned.
And you don't turn down margaritas and oral.
Randomize
