Joe is yelling at the trees again.
i'm really high, and this is sooooooooooo important. how many frosties does it take to fill a bathtub?
i just shit on the floor of my room. my roommate was in the bathroom, my choices were limited.
Theres a fat guy wearing a speedo. Someone just got puked on, and didnt even react. Whats happening?
I am lonely and I want to touch your beard
Should have know they were on something when he started filling a Togo container with fruit
I'm cutting her off I can't have my good name soiled with these kinds of shenanigans
Shit is preposterous
dude girls our age are getting married and having babies and I still can't figure out how to defrost my hotpockets
Going to the bathroom drunk while wearing overalls is such a struggle
if i do community service solely to impress a guy, everyone wins, right?
except your soul
I'd let you fuck my husband in the future, that's how much I love you
Woke up in a sombrero and a males speedo. Tequila makes normal peoples clothes fall off, however it makes me fall into a questionable identity crisis
Just screamed wow while using my vibrator.. new low
I feel like I may be the only person who can say they crutched their walk of shame. past the secret service.
Is she blowing you? I'm in the closet.
Randomize
