my girlfriend just informed me I need to get tested and so do you
girlfriend?
if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
you pissed in the sink and didnt realize it until it was time to wash your hands
I think its only fitting my first purchase with my student loan is a glass pipe? I think ill name it 'Subsidized'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I know is I had a penis in one hand a bottle of wine in the other
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
You were yelling in my ear let's double team her with her right next to us
Last night in my drunkenness I bought hurricane supplies which included a jug of wine and a bouquet of flowers. Apparently I'm going to woo Irene.
I'm going to need your assistance. I cannot walk back to the house in a bear costume.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I whispered "you're doing a great Job" when he was fucking me. Then high fived him.
This election needs to be over, im tired of girls asking who im going to vote for mid hookup
You asked the waitress what the corking fee would be on the Joose you smuggled into the restaurant.
It is officially Christmas time in Chicago. There's a drunk hobo on the CTA singing the first 2 lines of Frosty the Snowman over and over and over.
I just broke a sweat masturbating on a Friday night. I may need a boyfriend.
Our fake lesbian relationship is better than her real relationship. Bitch be jealous
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