this kid down the hall keeps banging on his drums...i feel like i'm living in jumanji
We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
Also managed to rip my pants and set myself on fire. And oddly enough I'm still not ready to ask for 2010 back.
btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese
That makes the second boyfriend of hers that I've fucked. I'm gonna start keeping an eye on every guy she even speaks to. Girl is my sexual rabbit's foot.
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
You know he really cares when he gives you one of those on-the-go toothbrushes for your walk of shame before running to work
I AM COVERED IN FAKE BLOOD AND REAL CUM. I AM AWESOME
It feels like a bunch of leprechauns are using my brain as a soccer ball
I'm like an air traffic controller of women. It's a very similar job. Well spaced and gentle landings are good. When they meet, it's bad. Explosions bad. Dying screaming burning children bad.
Is she okay?
She may want to issue revenge punches, but medically fine.
New war strategy! The ex-girlfriend of my ex-girlfriend is now my twice a week booty call!
Had a vaginal orgasm. I feel like I made sex my bitch.
i had to flash a cab last night.
did it work?
No. he slowed down but then kept going. story of my life.
hey if my parents say thanks for the meatballs just go with it ill explain later
Randomize