How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
i just woke up and its 10 o'clock and the words "Robbies Fave Restraunt" and written in sharpie above my vage. Help me.
GUESS WHAT I JUST LICKED
I feel like half our conversations start this way.
The crowing achievement of my life is still the time I made a 3 course meal out of things I found in the dumpster.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
bet u 5 dollars u can't guess were i woke up this morning
oh god.. jail?
better, on the catwalk of the auditorium
We drove past his house blaring "Like a virgin" in the middle of the day. pretty sure he heard.
I just spewed blue gatorade in the shower. It looked like the ocean.
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
My drug dealer just texted me that his kid had a rough sleep and was running late to deliver the ounce to my office. Totes adorbs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After the keg stand you collapsed, hit your head on the floor, started seizing and after 20 seconds got back up and said "hah, I remember my first beer"
I found a video of us drunkenly yelling "we wanna be the Pope" as we passed around the blunt
It looks like you got dick slapped by the sandman..
On a scale of "huh, that's interesting" to "holy porn stars, batman". How good?
Definitely closer to "holy porn stars, batman".
Is it weird to invite your FWB to thanksgiving dinner??
are you drinking tonight?
I have an exam tomorrow
so yes.
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