I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
I replied to the university automated mass text about the armed robbery at the on-campus Starbucks with a sad face. Basically sums up my night.
had a guy just try to take his underwear off in the middle of the bar w o taking his pants off. That kind of Sunday afternoon
I use him for alcohol and he uses me for sex. This is the closest thing to love i could imagine
Was just explained ingredients in a four loko. Puzzles of the universe starting to piece together.
I don't like finding out that my fuck buddy is a good person.
i cant wait to be back in my element of drunk, on a barstool, ive missed home
We fucked in my trunk while on the clock....what did you do at work today?
When you glanced over and and mouthed "I'll take the fat chick" I knew it was going to be an epic Sunday night.
Dude I should have just gone home with the guy with dreads and the cat
The fact that I am laying in bed on my stomach with an ice pack on my rump is a clear indication that I am no longer in my carefree 20s
He told me was "pretty like the wife in some movie where the husband is a cheater." I think I'm gonna fuck him.
Nice. I like it when Maker's Mark makes decisions for you.
The only thing he told me before he passed out was that he is from Buffalo and I'm a bitch.
I just bought six bottles of the 2 dollar vodka. oh yes there will be blood
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