i just woke up to 15 people singing a whole new world
This Casey James character from American Idol is really gonna mess up my sex life.
Or maybe the fact that you know who Casey James is will be what messes up your sex life.
Weekdays seemed more exciting when I had a drinking problem. Like I had something to look forward to at night.
Babe. Honestly. Trust me. Your balls are not that big. And i'm eager.
like he couldn't stop by and throw me in the back seat and ask for a blowjob? he had to give me flowers?
It's Friday afternoon and I'm drunk. This is how I cope.
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
ive cried into many a lonely burritos..
So, I feel bad. I just told my husband I had sex with someone else while on a business trip. Today is his birthday. I'm kind of a dick.
Man, it's really obvious that I was either handcuffed or tied up last night. Either way, not something you'd want coworkers knowing.
5 seconds ago I had no idea that a fart could travel so fastly thru the tanning bed. I taste it in the back of my neck.
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
I JUST NEEDED TO TELL YOU I JUST FUCKED TWO BOYS IN THE SPAN OF LIKE THREE HOURS AND ONE OF THEM WAS MY SISTERS PROM DATE FROM HIGH SCHOOL IM LOWKEY BOTH PROUD AND ASHAMED
He's the douchy one who wouldn't let me rip his shirt off, right?
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