Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
I am not deleting the internet history anymore, now I am going for shock value.
i had to do the walk of shame dressed as a leprechaun. I have never been more proud of my irish roots.
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
Hey, I can't get ahold of Tommy. Let him know his ex-girlfriend is pregnant.
I just did the nutritional comparison between 2% milk and Bud Light Lime.. the beer had less calories, less carbs, and less fat. It's not looking good for milk in my life anymore
I might have been fine if i had magic teleportation powers and could have skipped the car ride between bar and home
I just woke up entirely naked on top of a pile of some guy's laundry on his bedroom floor.
He sent me a picture of his dick saying "your throne my lady" for my birthday. He knows the way to my heart.
That was the night you tried to convince me you threw up your sould because your throwup was black
All I've had to eat today are potatoes...and by that I mean vodka and chips
i've got three words. i. was. spanked.
were you aware we were supposed to be taking care of her hamster this weekend?
I turn 40 next week. I deserve to celebrate the end of my 30’s with a 21 year old dick
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