TLC. RIGHT NOW. PRIMORDIAL TODDLERS.
I have a new drinking limit. I'll stop when I know I'm going to untag the picture that was just taken of me.
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
I wish there was a non slutty way to ask the guys across the hall if i can copy their men's bathroom key so I have one for my one night stands
These 19 Underage Drinkers Epicly Got By With A Horrible Fake ID
He kept coming back from the bar with hotter girls and just left with two...I feel like I just witnessed something amaZing. Like meeting Jesus and finding out he has no morals either
Dude, I think someone on your skype account may have seen me beat off. I used your computer and didnt realize you were still signed in. Please tell me no one was on...
I seriously don't understand how you keep getting laid.
Because I'm like the spider of false hope. I spin elaborate tales and snare them in my web of utter disappointment. They soon realize their mistake, but by then it's too late.
We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
Monday is now my bitch. I just did 20 naked push ups on the bar for $20
These Are The 21 Strangest Sexual Fantasy Confessions
Who gives a hand job to a 19 yr old one night then the next lets a 31 year old random man fly a plane to town and pick u up and take u to dinner?
Aside from the possibility of pregnancy, I'm going to call last night a raging success.
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
I'm scared because his knowledge of star trek is turning me on
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
See, this is why you don't do nice things for people. You'll get stuck in the snow and you won't catch a dick.