Welp...herpes.
I think he just gave me the 'I used to fuck your sister' discount
I had sex with her because I didn't want to hurt her feelings.. You're the one who told me I should be more sensitive.
Somehow "stranger danger" turned into making out with a 25 year old on burbon street.
I'm gonna have to fantasize about her dying just to get off.
We're stealing the mannequin. He's my new swimming partner.
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
The number of males in the usa getting circumsized are decreasing. Keep this in mind when we become cougars
You chest bumped everyone we walked by on the way home... Even girls
Like wrapping my dick in silk, wrapping that in velvet, and putting it in a cloud. A warm, tight, wet cloud.
he fucked me wearing a cowboy hat and made grits after
We call him Texas for a reason.
Dude, half of south Mississippi has seen my taint. I'm not worried.
Also I just took the BEST ass selfie of my adult life.... it's gonna be a good day haha
I haven’t been this excited since I found out they sold cases of Jack Daniels.
I got subtly pornographic with a lollipop while we were talking and he got flustered and started to blush. If he’s not interested after that I need to turn in my vagina card.
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