I just got fire extinguished by his roommate while we were having sex. That's just taking cock blocking to a whole new level.
Tell your boyfriend I'm sorry for ruining his vein. I'm never drawing blood drunk again.
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
We had to go visit his dealer in the hospital to buy some weed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I smell like fire and strippers. Successful sunday funday.
she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems
Haha jealous. If I could remember my dreams I'm pretty sure they would constantly be about being drunk in foreign countries
Screw disneyland. This military base is the happiest place on earth. Even unnatractive dudes are completely fuckable in those uniforms, im never leaving
We celebrated our relationship by shotgunning beers on his lawn in our underwear. I may have to marry this man...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What am I even going to do with 20 more jello shots? And don't say give them to the cat
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
I really wish you were home bc youre the only friend I could ask to use an at home waxing kit on my vagina. I need you.
I learned the hard way a garbage bag will not save you when jumping from a tree at 2am
He ate me out in the passenger seat of his Range Rover in a Tim Hortons parking lot. I could hear “oh canada” on the radio from a nearby school as I came. Most patriotic orgasm ever!
I forgot to bring soap and all I could find here was body wash. It's like bathing with laundry detergent.
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