i'm surrounded by gay midgets. not sure if i'm bragging or asking you to come rescue me. wait for follow up.
If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
we hooked up on one of my student's desks last night...i can't decide if i'm ashamed or massively proud of myself
dude you teach first grade wtf
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
Stealing vibrators from Walmart together was when I realized you'd be my Maid of Honor.
Def drinking wine from a 4 liter jug at 11 am. If i call you in 20 years talking about 12 steps, please trace is back to this moment.
ok, my life is complete.... the cops AND the paramedic just made a Mean Girls reference...
I believe I convinced two girls to makeout for freedom last night Hahaha
You could breast feed yourself wine!! This shit is genius!
Seeing the pictures of him and i, I'm giving whiskey the win on this one. Definitely had beer goggles.
Last night I passed a kidney stone as I came inside her. Worst. Experience. Ever.
What happened to my knees?
You ate shit in front of the homeless people. They applauded.
Literally just sitting around waiting for someone to come along and fuck my chakras back into alignment
You can be responsible and still be on that ho life
if you were broke and planning on using koolaid as a tequila chaser which flavor would you pick?
Randomize
