im pretty sure i tried to attack the vending machine last night
lol who won
well im in the hospital right now so u tell me
Just told the nurse I wouldn't get on the scale. Told her to write FAT.
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
Do something fun then. Blow up the house or whatever.
How have you survived this long?
Dumb luck and a deal with the devil.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You did this to me with your delicious pizza and moonshine.
I'll forgive you once we're drunk again by noon.
I had the hottest doctor assess me at the hospital. He smelled like heaven and sex.
Just scratched my head and I basically rained glitter.
We were sad, then we got horny, and then we needed some ranch
I woke up just like any other Wednesday. Naked on the floor, hungover and covered head to toe in lube
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he made me cum so hard i had an asthma attack
Atleast we had sex on the couch before your ex took it from you
Kyle passed out in the tub after breaking a glass and shouting, "WHAT ASSHOLE GAVE ME A GLASS?" His girlfriend gave it to him...
These rednecks don't fuck around. This party is completely BYOB and we now have 6 kegs, 3 of which have already been emptied.
Just letting you know that your little sister is now your eskimo brother. You can send a thank you edible arrangement to Tammy.
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
Randomize