so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
I'm jammin out to some Brit Birt, she's still my bitch, I love her crazy ass
she pooed on me. she actually pooed on me.
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like having to pee in a condom for my cousin so that he can pass a drug test.
Technically this isn't a church so we could have been drinking this whole time.
ahh summer, the season during which the prefix for every verb is "get drunk and"
Omg calling you in 10 to update you on who I peed on last night
She just fell in the river. Meet us downstream with the bottle.
Spent the entire ride home from downtown trying to convince designated dawgs to drop us off at waffle house instead of our apartment. i told them it was my house...they didn't buy it.
You know you're old when tea and a hot bath are more appealing than beer pong with lesbians.
Is that a polar bear? You seriously grinded with a polar bear at the club?
He wanted me to strip for him. I told him that we aren't at that serious of a fuck buddy relationship yet
It's gotten to a point that when guys say "I'm gonna cum" I've developed a habit of responding "dooo itttt" in a deep voice. #isthatweird
Thou shall not get drunk and hit bitch cup in pong and take shirt off while wearing a see-through lace bra again
Plus you need some new dick in your life, the environment is fucked enough you don’t have to recycle anymore 😂💀
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