just got pizza delivered to the hot tub. its easier than i thought to be this lazy
Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
my sisters under your porch take her home
why do all the strippers look like they came from fraggle rock
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
Just made a Mimosa with Chardonnay and Emergen-C.
Just made nicotine water. Ithink i'm having a heart attack.
Come on, without my personality, I'm a pretty good one night stand.
Definitely want to eloquently cunt punt those bitches thru the field goals of life.
Really? Uh ohh sounds like a double date with extra stripper funnnn
Got a 72 hour restraining order. Can we meet monday? Let me know!
I am about five seconds from ripping off my clothes and throwing myself into the ocean to become a mermaid
Is 36 too old to fuck a college student? THIS IS BOTH IMPORTANT AND TIME SENSITIVE
I'm on a party bus with a stripper pole with middle aged women who have all started drinking
God bless your soul.
everything I love is going to destroy me, so if coconuts are the answer, so be it.
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