And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
who are you and why are you in my phone as dr. seuss
Shark Week may as well be Shark Weed.
after eating me out, he asked for something to drink. i gave him a glass of water and he said he needed something stronger.
In hindsight, trust falling your grandma was a bad idea. Sorry about that.
I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
Well good for him for getting your number before he told you he had no money and needed you to pay for his drink!
some people spend their whole lives trying to find their soulmate. who knew mine was hiding in utah successfully balancing a pageant career and a coke habit.
He puked over my shoulder into the toilet. The guy in the next stall sounded totally appalled.
and then you two started interpretive dancing to Mozart
My booty call is in the theater watching Deadpool right now. Never though comics would work against me.
Nothing says responsible like taking your birth control with an open bottle of wine you left on your night stand from the night before
And I woke up by myself with peanut butter.. Cool
Are we DOING anything for lunch...if sex is involved, let's just be straight forward and stop wasting the first half hour! We just need to get to the point
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
Randomize
