Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
I had sex with him, and then he gave me a $5 Starbucks gift card. Totally worth it
She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
Listen, i'm watching playoff hockey and eating waffles. i just don't have time for your drama today.
if i die of alcohol poisoning tonight, just know i kinda expected it and totally deserved it
PS- I just stirred my mimosa with a slice of bacon
come to Starbucks. I'm the fat girl eating a whole pizza sitting on the ground
Slutty costumes are my most sacred holiday tradition! Wearing a not-slutty costume is like putting cheezwiz on a communion wafer.
YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL.
Well the streets were closed, so it was okay for me to just lay down for a little bit.
Jill you already won the game by finding a dude who will fuck you in flamingo knee socks. Theres no hope for the rest of us
Sitting naked in my bed eating leftover Mexican food drinking coors light.. Can it get any more single than this?
How do you tell a vegan you want him to stuff you like a turkey?
Nobody cheats on THIS.
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
Randomize
