he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
Awesome, the library of congress archived all tweets. Now my great great grandchildren can pinpoint the date they inherited alcoholism.
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
Sorry we're taking so long, this weed cake tastes amazing with Tabasco sauce on it.
Should we start at nine like normal people or now like alcoholics?
So apparently the only parts of last night I remember didn't actually happen.. When did vodka become a hallucinogen?
I'm going to sing sad and lonely Barbra Streisand songs at the top of my lungs if you don't get here soon
Seriously I am not buying you condoms anymore. You're 22, if you aren't woman enough to buy them yourself then you don't deserve orgasms. Grow some tits.
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
He thought I was gay. I had to explain I just really like wearing flannel.
Well if YOU HAVE TO KNOW, we're laying across the street from the bar on that grassy hill trying to see who's she's with at the bar.
I had a dream last night that Sam and Dean had to get rid of a murderous ghost haunting an elf on the shelf. I think I'm ready for Christmas to be over.
One singular head for man, one giant climax for mankind
it's like that time i was drunk at relay for life. but with balloon animals...
Opening my shipments of mascara and nipple pasties this morning like a boss bitch
Randomize
