No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
Paying 5 grand for boobs is saving me like 10 grand in weed
I really don't think you should have 'baptized' your tattoo in vodka the same night you got it.
In all fairness I did warn the guy I just spray tanned before we had sex so I hold no responsibility for the bronzer all over his sheets
Don't use the things I tell you while drunk after the bruins won the cup against me
She tried to leave the threesome and I heard you yell "Hey! We don't quit at halftime!"
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
Dude, we tried to feed you but you just started sobbing and ran away
So his shoes are still here. And there are three contacts in a case. And a shirt on the bed. I've checked my dorm and he's not here. I'm so confused.
We watched the first ever season of SNL and fucked for so long. He accidentally punched me in the face, but I mean, John Belushi was the background noise of our sex. I can deal with it.
I'm not THAT invested in seeing you to an orgasm
My boss doesn't know what jello shots are. I've lost faith in this company.
He fucked me so hard my hair extensions fell out
I know it's New Year's Eve but if you're going to have a bunch of chicks playing strip go fish in our apartment I need a heads up.
Randomize
