My friend's 9-year-old son just informed me that for a cop station, you can't use a shotgun; you have to use a machine gun. Thank you, Grand Theft Auto, for single-handedly corrupting our youth.
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
You can't like Harry Potter and Twilight. You have to pick. Vampires and Wizards are mutually exclusive.
we were going to warn you, but we veto-ed that idea somewhere between "this is the stupidest thing we've ever done" and "let's order a pizza"
so you had a one ended conversation with the toilet las night in between barfs. you kept telling the toilet how strong it was because its gone through a lot of shit in its life.
drunk me is so punny.
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
Maybe it was that imaginary ghost dick you were stuffing in your mouth a minute ago
He thought my hair would soak it up. I HAD TO CUT IT OFF.
If we order a pizza and I contribute 9 cents, is that fair?
I'm in the ER bruh, I went skinny dipping last night and a cat fish bit my dick.
Nothing like putting a Percocet up your nose because you spent your night drinking heavily and can't drink water to make you heavily reconsider your life choices
I just asked my mom if I could be the drunk realitive at the reunion. She said as long as I'm not obvious.
Jesus fuck. I just hit on him in front of the whole fire department. They hit the sirens and told us to get a room. FML. I can never go back to that fire station again...
You know how fear has a smell? Well turns out shame has a smell too. It's Pina colada flavored anal grease.
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