i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
there seems to be a considerable amount of hair missing from my left hand. i may have lit it on fire again
I confess. I just downed the bottle of saki. And I'm singing phantom of the opera to the dogs. Be glad you're not here for the high notes.
can't believe I traded a good night's sleep and a midterm for your blurry tits
Dude you chased a girl around the yard and then fell over the curb. Face first. You got up on your own tho so you reached champion status
are you just inviting me because you can't afford an actual stripper?
Don't blame me. My vagina leads me astray.
Between fucking and sleeping I woke up missing four out of five of the earrings I was wearing. It's like a star rating system. I had to give him props.
I ran into a wall that clearly had things popping out. My eyebrow was bruised, both arms, the bottom of my foot. Lost half of my finger nail, my fake eyelash was stuck in my hair and I have about 47 blurry pictures of a half naked zombie DJ.
No, you are in the clear. The police officer finally just said "I give up" and walked away.
There was a woman who drank mouth wash to get drunk during her supposed detox...this is def the internship for me!
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
How did you get so drunk?
Alcohol.
You ran the halls of the dorm naked handing out condoms. You were the sex fairy. Best you can do if you're not getting laid.
Randomize
