he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
It feels like you stuck your dick in a fire and then branded the inside of me.
I might have been the first person to be rolling balls at a referee seminar
Are you high?
The snorkel mask makes that pretty clear
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
My lunch = taste testing salsas for A&P. They gave me a free 64oz grape juice as a thank you. So, now we have something to drink in the house. So while you are spending all the money on breakfast rolls and pizza for lunch, I'm cigaretteless and whoring myself for tablespoons of salsa and free juice.
I responded with "neat-o burrito" to his SEXT...he tried so hard and I just panicked.
Dude, my sex life is so sad since I started having feelings.
Sleeping with just one person sucks
I was going to learn how to knit but I got high instead.
I'm twenty nine years old, now is not the time to start trying new drugs. I need a hedge fund...not another drug-induced hangover.
My vagina feels like a chupacabra ripped me apart using its mythological set of needle pointed teeth
DUDE!!!!! THERE IS A MIDGET HANDING OUT RICE KRISPIE TREATS!!!!!! WHERE ARE YOU WHEN THE COOL SHIT GOES DOWN???????
Actually, my eyes didn't start bleeding until the next day. So it was a pretty awesome night overall.
Randomize
