That's what you get for not wearing a bra and jumping on a trampoline
walking home from your place the other day I saw a man with a ponytail sitting on some church steps petting a plant
he should get drunk with us
I've decided to film a documentary centered around how he manages to keep that beast caged in such tight pants
love makes seman taste better
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I lost my virginity in that bed. You just layed in history.
the last thing i remember was trying to convince him to call over his girlfriend so we could have a threesome
My mom asked me to donate my child hood stuffed animals to the poor then I realized I was hiding liquor behind them. I told her I was too attached to them. She understood. Wrong in so many ways.
He told me the hand job I gave him this morning was "lovely".
And your hair- I'd make sure to pee on it first.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Excuse me but the alley way I wanted to fuck in happens to be a very nice clean area.
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
Currently behind the bar at some asian place, pouring drinks for everyone with a snake around my neck
He wore nothing but a Speedo and a tie to the party. It was great. Everyone was looking at him like "this kid's the best"
Never thought I'd see the day when I got assless chaps in the mail, and yet here we are...
dude i haven't had a solid dump since sunday and i still cant hear out of my right ear
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