Serious question...Is it possible to get a DUI on a kayak?
He purred while eating me out. HE PURRED AND I LIKED IT.
That bar is one yeast infection away from total annihilation.
Denial and avoidance are my survival strategies for 2013.
Denial, avoidance and beer.
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
They were so big her bra clasped in the front. Didn't even know those existed.
She's going to be the first to die of too much illness. Not even super bad stuff like cancer but like for having a cold at the same time as a sore throat and chlamydia or something. Just too much diseases.
Why is your solution always to masturbate
Because it usually works
I was trying to remember why my knees hurt then I remembered I was twerking on the countertops.
Fun fact: the guy I banged last night. His middle name on his birth certificate is "Windstorm."
He just brought a live lobster to the party.
I know its 2 in the morning and everything. But i just straight up yelled "DON'T YOU UNDERSTAND THIS WORLD IS DIFFICULT ENOUGH AS IT IS WITHOUT YOU PULLING THIS BULLSHIT ON ME" to my taco. Because it fell apart on me. I think i might be cracking under this finals pressure.
Moms passed out wet and naked in a rocking chair again....
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
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