I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
hey my socially awkward cousin is our designated driver for summer, we just have to put up with her wierd shit.
Seriously, I would hit on barney the dinosaur right now if it meant I was going to get laid.
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
I feel like I've been drunk all of June. And I am in NO WAY ashamed about it.
Im deleting that text because its a possible ncaa violation
God I hope the gutter I die in is nice. You know, for a gutter.
If she wants experimental lesbian sex, i call dibs
It makes showers more interesting trying to drink a gin and tonic and keep soap out of my eyes at the same time.
You need to calm down.
Nothing warms my heart more than the sight of a naked hockey player in my bed.
Every guy I've ever fucked is single right now
Pray for me
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
She said to call her, so I called her. Her boyfriend answered and traced the fucking call. I could litterally hear him yell because it turns out he lives in 4d
Don't you live in 4c?
To be honest, I'm more surprised when you're not high at this point
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
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