Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (310): View more from California

  I like bacon cheeseburgers and the pussycat dolls

  (415): View more from California

  Does that mean you want me to loosen up your buttons at carls jr?

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  (310): I like bacon cheeseburgers and the pussycat dolls (415): Does that mean you want me to loosen up your buttons at carls jr? http://tfl.nu/tx8e
  Replies (7) Good night (1561) Bad night (520)
• Favorite

  (410): View more from Maryland

  I'm drunk at The Bachelor casting call in Cleveland

  (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  I cherish every text you send me

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  (410): I'm drunk at The Bachelor casting call in Cleveland (412): I cherish every text you send me http://tfl.nu/05mc
  Replies (49) Good night (6163) Bad night (734)
• Favorite

  (203): View more from Connecticut

  Now you know why i just sit on the toilet and scream

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  (203): Now you know why i just sit on the toilet and scream http://tfl.nu/mtat
  Replies (23) Good night (702) Bad night (4572)
• Favorite

  (778): View more from British Columbia

  Dude, she introduced me to her best friend form Russia and she was a 10. Her other Russian friend was even hotter. How did communism fail?

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  (778): Dude, she introduced me to her best friend form Russia and she was a 10. Her other Russian friend was even hotter. How did communism fail? http://tfl.nu/fzou
  Replies (20) Good night (4902) Bad night (852)
• Favorite

  (802): View more from Vermont

  I feel like I'm in a bed a bagels and mistakes.

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  (802): I feel like I'm in a bed a bagels and mistakes. http://tfl.nu/xpl7
  Replies (7) Good night (1021) Bad night (1860)
• Favorite

  (419): View more from Ohio

  His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch

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  (419): His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch http://tfl.nu/wbxj
  Replies (13) Good night (4183) Bad night (1502)
• Favorite

  (618): View more from Illinois

  An hour ago, you were stranded out of state, and now you're getting laid? You are a god. Whatever you do, don't ask her name.

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  (618): An hour ago, you were stranded out of state, and now you're getting laid? You are a god. Whatever you do, don't ask her name. http://tfl.nu/g5lt
  Replies (5) Good night (2414) Bad night (627)
• Favorite

  (519): View more from Ontario

  The melted ice in my drinks tonight is probably the most water I've had in like 3 days accumulated.

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  (519): The melted ice in my drinks tonight is probably the most water I've had in like 3 days accumulated. http://tfl.nu/ajsd
  Replies (5) Good night (1527) Bad night (983)
• Favorite

  (789): View more from

  You just kept walking around saying "my brain is soup" then sat on the kitchen counter washing your feet. You bit the guy that tried to help you down

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  (789): You just kept walking around saying "my brain is soup" then sat on the kitchen counter washing your feet. You bit the guy that tried to help you down http://tfl.nu/6vfu
  Replies (2) Good night (1351) Bad night (797)
• Favorite

  (407): View more from Florida

  It was total unicorn galloping on a fucking rainbow awesome.

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  (407): It was total unicorn galloping on a fucking rainbow awesome. http://tfl.nu/288f
  Replies (2) Good night (1366) Bad night (545)
• Favorite

  (302): View more from Delaware

  I have a third degree burn on my inner thigh from the blunt dropping on me in the car

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  (302): I have a third degree burn on my inner thigh from the blunt dropping on me in the car http://tfl.nu/rca8
  Replies (6) Good night (247) Bad night (778)
• Favorite

  (203): View more from Connecticut

  I had sex on a dinosaur comforter, tell me that does not define my life.

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  (203): I had sex on a dinosaur comforter, tell me that does not define my life. http://tfl.nu/lclu
  Replies (1) Good night (526) Bad night (294)
• Favorite

  (732): View more from New Jersey

  Drowning in science and also vodka. Hope you're having fun.

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  (732): Drowning in science and also vodka. Hope you're having fun. http://tfl.nu/t14n
  Replies (2) Good night (424) Bad night (227)
• Favorite

  (570): View more from Pennsylvania

  Jungle juice turns everything into a pickup line. All I said was "do you play chess" and somehow I got laid.

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  (570): Jungle juice turns everything into a pickup line. All I said was "do you play chess" and somehow I got laid. http://tfl.nu/yx4k
  Replies (1) Good night (739) Bad night (228)
• Favorite

  (301): View more from Maryland

  First thing that comes on in the morning is kanye's I can't hold my liquor. yeezus lives.

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  (301): First thing that comes on in the morning is kanye's I can't hold my liquor. yeezus lives. http://tfl.nu/0sul
  Replies (0) Good night (397) Bad night (308)

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