Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

Favorite
(334): View more from Alabama

Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(334): Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened. http://tfl.nu/9jlv

Replies (16) Good night (4995) Bad night (1303)
Favorite
(832): View more from Houston, Texas

I just found out how hard it is to put together a fake Christmas tree with a hangover.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(832): I just found out how hard it is to put together a fake Christmas tree with a hangover. http://tfl.nu/1njk

Replies (14) Good night (3117) Bad night (1188)
Favorite
(412): View more from Pennsylvania

thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(412): thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out. http://tfl.nu/825u

Replies (14) Good night (3708) Bad night (850)
Favorite
(479): View more from Arkansas

This can't be good. I've realized that I weigh less in the morning after I have had a blackout drunk night than when I work out and eat healthy.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(479): This can't be good. I've realized that I weigh less in the morning after I have had a blackout drunk night than when I work out and eat healthy. http://tfl.nu/jw79

Replies (14) Good night (3749) Bad night (1284)
Favorite
(407): View more from Florida

I kno. She bruised her chin trying to swim thru the hardwood floor.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(407): I kno. She bruised her chin trying to swim thru the hardwood floor. http://tfl.nu/1ho2

Replies (4) Good night (3220) Bad night (1128)
Favorite
(817): View more from Texas

He turned down a handjob. A HANDJOB. I know I'm no Jessica Simpson, but...

(1-817): View more from Texas

Actually, she's fat now, so...

(817): View more from Texas

Fuck. I AM Jessica Simpson.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(817): He turned down a handjob. A HANDJOB. I know I'm no Jessica Simpson, but... (1-817): Actually, she's fat now, so... (817): Fuck. I AM Jessica Simpson. http://tfl.nu/7993

Replies (27) Good night (2027) Bad night (5157)
Favorite
(717): View more from Pennsylvania

She made me go down the fire escape when her mom came for breakfast.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(717): She made me go down the fire escape when her mom came for breakfast. http://tfl.nu/4m88

Replies (7) Good night (2684) Bad night (936)
Favorite
(416): View more from Toronto

He said he has something to give me... I swear to God if it's a joint or a framed picture of his penis i'm going to kill him

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(416): He said he has something to give me... I swear to God if it's a joint or a framed picture of his penis i'm going to kill him http://tfl.nu/ykad

Replies (12) Good night (2553) Bad night (1007)
Favorite
(513): View more from Ohio

2 things. 1. I just gave her a 6 hour long marathon fucking for America. 2. Thought of a new invention halfway through, and it's flawless.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(513): 2 things. 1. I just gave her a 6 hour long marathon fucking for America. 2. Thought of a new invention halfway through, and it's flawless. http://tfl.nu/7smn

Replies (16) Good night (4178) Bad night (752)
Favorite
(847): View more from Illinois

couldn't find my pants so i stole a pair of shorts from the passed out kid in the corner.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(847): couldn't find my pants so i stole a pair of shorts from the passed out kid in the corner. http://tfl.nu/srex

Replies (6) Good night (2491) Bad night (809)
Favorite
(801): View more from Utah

I found your pet lobster in the bathroom this morning. I went to return it to you but it escaped.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(801): I found your pet lobster in the bathroom this morning. I went to return it to you but it escaped. http://tfl.nu/dgi2

Replies (10) Good night (1676) Bad night (734)
Favorite
(519): View more from Ontario

Are you drunk? Because I am and if you're not, this may be very awkward in the morning

(416): View more from Toronto

Thats for me to know and you to find out.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(519): Are you drunk? Because I am and if you're not, this may be very awkward in the morning (416): Thats for me to know and you to find out. http://tfl.nu/ors0

Replies (1) Good night (1223) Bad night (472)
Favorite
(+44): View more from United Kingdom

Thats why you dont have a "jubilant gunfire celebration"

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(+44): Thats why you dont have a "jubilant gunfire celebration" http://tfl.nu/5fdi

Replies (3) Good night (379) Bad night (267)
Favorite
(262): View more from Wisconsin

I have to masturbate tonight while watching every Paul Walker movie ever made. It's what he would have wanted. RIP Paul.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(262): I have to masturbate tonight while watching every Paul Walker movie ever made. It's what he would have wanted. RIP Paul. http://tfl.nu/9aqu

Replies (6) Good night (698) Bad night (433)
Favorite
(330): View more from Ohio

Can I join you for some emotional "Post: The Ohio State University's first lose in football after a 24 game winning streak" sex?

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(330): Can I join you for some emotional "Post: The Ohio State University's first lose in football after a 24 game winning streak" sex? http://tfl.nu/2s7k

Replies (9) Good night (525) Bad night (314)

Randomize

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Find Us On: