I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
Ed hardy makes air fresheners now. Now even the air can be a douchebag.
you drank 3/4s of your half gallon of vodka, made a fort out of the kitchen table, and actaually had sex in in it.
I hate when people I sell to add me on Facebook. I'm your dealer, not your friend, C'mon people.
This chick just checked into her walk of shame on Foursquare... I think I'm in love.
The fact that she put a frat guy in check tells me I did some good raising my little sister. Time to see if she does keg stands.
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
Oh, also as a concerning side note, my bra had drops of blood on it. So I don't know what the deal was, but someone I was around was definitely bleeding a decent amount.
he thought it would be funny to put his dick inside a beer bottle and wear it around. until we all realized how small his dick would have to be to fit in a beer bottle
I spent the entire night stroking his hair. He was cool with it. Never thought a ginger stoner would help me work through my social anxiety but here we are.
It's a sexual break up. We maintain a friendship and leave any and all sexual attraction out. It's not hard, having a baby is harder than that.
I think that's the first time I had "ass rimming" scroll across my phone at work
Being an adult can't be all bad. I just took a vacation day solely to sit around and get stoned
I am literally watching TV with sunglasses on because the brightness hurts my hangover
I'm currently hiding from this horrific thing that we call adulthood. If anyone needs me, I'll be smoking a bowl in the bouncy house.
Randomize
