Remember ______, girl, blonde, one of my roommates the first year of ________?
Yeah we hooked up in the top bunk bed while simultaneously having a conversation with u, so yeah, I remember her
consequently i now know what mace tastes like
he came over wasted, used the bathroom, drank some water, and fell asleep holding my hand. what kind of a fuck buddy does that??
It was also my first failed attempt at shower sex.
I'm being an old woman and getting trashed in a night gown in public...of course it's going to be fun
you don't know true fear until you are a convinced that velociraptors are trying to kill you through your roof.
Last night was the first and hopefully last night I will ever sleep in a hotel bath tub. Sober mind you.
I'm not even gonna ask.
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
Romney sounds like a middle school girl and that creepy ass smile makes me want to close my blinds
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
SShout out to Barney the Dinosaur for teaching me how to sing the ABCs backward. I just scored a free pitcher.
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
The assignment was about the Industrial Revolution so I just screamed at them in a British accent all day. No, they didn't know I was hungover.
Can you confirm that you aren't dead?
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