It's American, baby! There ain't nothin gross about America.
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
he puked in my glove box, looked up at me and said "There's not much to say"
They're doing shots to celebrate every 15 minutes passing. You can come get them.
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
Just did coke off of a cross necklace and am headed to the strip club. Happy Easter!
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
I think I'm a wingman for every guy who bangs a girl I scarred in highschool.
We can't go back there. Ever. No context required, just know it's true.
Some guy named spider just bought me 5 shots
just discovered a semi frightening wound on the side of my head that must have happened last night. if i die of a brain aneurysm, make sure they put "sorry for partying" on my gravestone.
All I’ve had today is sex and water. I think it’s time for tacos.
Let the clothes fall where they may.
He forgot how to sit. we had to pick him up and set him down.
I cant promise hot guys but i can promise alcohol which is close enough.
Randomize
