1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
There are no words to adequately express my gratitude for sending me porn you found staring a former classmate.
did you seriously make the punch out of vodka and food coloring
Just caught my first cougar this fake was worth every fucking penny.
For some reason there are two like 10 year old black girls crumping at the bar. I feel like I'm in a missy elliot video.
You kept trying to throw the grocery cart off the balcony.
Not sure why, but I was running back and forth across the road. Cab hit me and gave us a free ride home.
I just spent my entire state tax return on sex toys
Well, that was my first dog walk of shame. Nothing says "I've got my life together" like an inside out shirt and a baggie full of dog shit.
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
She started snoring post sex, so I drunkenly walked 8 miles at 4am to go fishing. Please come pick me up
Yeah just pls explain the dishes and the dildo. I don't want to lose my job over a dick in the cooler.
I went from swearing off of sex to planning a threesome. It's been a rollercoaster of a day.
We were peeing side by side on the riverbank together and I felt like nothing brings you closer than drunken riverbank urinating so I caught her a friendship frog to wipe with since we left the tp in the canoe.
I just licked honey off my own tit. Is there anything about that which doesn't SCREAM single???
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