No, I was feeling sad because all of the other girls were like model-skinny. But then I remembered that I had big boobs and went to hit on their boyfriends.
I just fucked 3 marines at the same time...how did you celebrate veterans day?
Her underwear doesnt even match. If youre going to be a face book whore at least have matching shit.
She stopped mid-blowjob to introduce herself to us
i slept with him so i could steal the screens out of his sink faucets for my bowl when he went to sleep. not because he's funny.
An there's a little girl across the bar eating Mac n cheese... #1 she won't stop looking at me. Boo bitch I'm drinking alone. #2 I'm about to tackle her ass for that Mac n cheese.
dude wearing that thong all day was not worth the 7 bucks
we got cut off at 8 am. He spilled his drink three times on the plane. this should be one hell of a vegas trip
if she didnt wantt to be febrezed, she shouldnt have smelled so desperate.
You were force feeding yourself jello and you kept repeating, "I will not surrender"
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
I'm sorry I tried to stab you. I just really wanted those mozerella sticks.
I don't think it counts as a booty call at 6:30 pm.
Having a bangable neighbor is going to ruin my booty call game. I refuse to go across town for dick now
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