Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
You asked my mom "who the fuck drives four hours to sleep in a guys bed and not touch his penis"
He got 20 stiches.. Who knew so much damage could come from a single shopping cart.
The best part about living in a college town is the annual rush of senior girls who want to get in their lesbian experiment before they graduate.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you know how to give stiches?
I do not...this text concerns me
I can feel my teeth in 4 dimensions. I shouldnt be this high at 8 in the morning.
come home. i made deep-fried hotdogs; don't let me die alone.
There is a drunken, assless white chick here at this bar wearing a shirt that says "REAL WOMEN TWERK FOR JESUS". I have officially had it with our generation.
I was trying to remember why my knees hurt then I remembered I was twerking on the countertops.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The only monogamous relationship I can keep is with my eyebrow lady...
He stood next to me peeing as I was puking behind a car in the parking lot, telling me how much he loved me. On the other hand, he loves me!
He saw me naked after our first date and still asked for a second.. so I think we’re doing good
So if i am talking to a guy and he sends me a pic and he is wearing Spiderman button down dress shirt.... Is it ok if i dont want to talk to him anymore?
Pooping in a box is not fun. You're not a cat.
I was pretty sure he wouldn't be into me after I fucked his brother, and then his best friend, and yet, here I am doing lines off his stomach
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