return my video game
I just woke up to my FedEx of contacts I've been waiting for for about a week and my hungover ass went to the bathroom and used beer instead of contact solution.
I officially lit my glove on fire while lighting the bong. Winter needs to end.
We're playing fucking games. GAMES. THIS IS BULL SHIT. IM GOING TO THROW UP ON THE BABIES AND LEAVE.
He says I tipped the waitress ten dollars because she "smelled like pigs in a blanket."
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
You did a line of free coke with an obese Slovenian unlicensed cab driver in the toilets of the most questionable strip club in the country. New low man.
When you put it like that, I'm inclined to agree.
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
Who ever is in the stall next to me is crying and it sounds like they're doing massive amounts of blow too. Finals for your ass huh.
I Have a huge scrape on my knee and I need a better excuse than dry humping on a park bench...
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
He did 5 five hand stand push ups and took off his shirt for a barbarian flex. Some girl took off her shirt and threw it at him
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
I love how fuckboys immediately become cultured when I tell them I’m an artist.
So drinking that old rum that I found in the ceiling of my dorm was prob not my best idea. But good news: my puke was so colorful b/c of all the skittles i ate
Randomize
