He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
We just all danced like dinosaurs in the center of the dance floor.
so the sex was amazing up until the point where she said "wow, you're even better than your dad!"
So i told him he was the 3rd i have ever slept with and then i found out he had actually slept with 5 other girls besides me. And his reply was well your number one on this hand.
I may or may not have just sent the bartender a pic of me in my slutty cheerleader costume with the caption "rah rah ree, gimme yo d"
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
Dude. Cab ride home consisted of me making out with an Asian girl sitting next to my Dad
got blackout drunk at the conference and wandered around Minneapolis with a homeless person until one of the other interns found me...I think I'm ready for adulthood.
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
I only blacked out one night of three if that isn't fucking personal growth idk what is
he probably thinks i inited him over to have sex but really i just want to show him 90's music videos
If there was a category for "most likely to end up a serial killer" in your high school yearbook then I'm sure you would have won it
Know we haven't talked but having an orgy party on the 20th if you're interested. If not, disregard this text.
Who is this?
All I know is I woke up with my apartment door wide open, naked, and I poured an entire bottle of Advil on my bed to sleep in.
I told him. He hasn't said anything. Crying and holding cats is probably what is happening.
Randomize
