the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
so all the bums hang out by my new store, they have a leader we call king bum... He got dethroned by police today for choking out a hooker. The bum heirarchy is in shambles right now.
tell me how i ended up in the movie theater alone with a bottle of smirnoff and a bendy straw.
I've developed breathing exercises to keep myself from puking..
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
Come to me. Jacob is confessing his love and all I want is a hot dog. With chili. Not love.
I'm just sad for you. It sucks that the 17 douchebag asshole guys you're fucking can't morph into one nice, normal, non-alcoholic guy that has a drivers license and no criminal history.
The pastor just stopped the sermon to lay hands on me. THAT hungover.
yo btw licking skeptical coke off table right now
Just got shoved by an Elvis impersonator. Evidently it isn't cool to ask how much of a disappointment they are in the eyes of their parents.
My vagina is screaming your name . Wtf did you do to it
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
Legit hope my Trump humping Brother dies of this shit so I can stop pretending to still love him.
You told him he “could park his dick in your garage”.
Well he didn’t. It shouldn’t be this hard to get a penis.
It's like the perfect sandwich, once you find it you want to ensure your future access to it.
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