So there is a chick dressed up in a vagina costume handing out free condoms next to the dude handing out free Bibles and preaching about sin. I love college.
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
Julian told me all the fish in his pond died and he didn't know when or how. I didn't have the heart to tell him he drunkenly peed in the pond on Saturday as everyone cheered him on.
Two man bar crawl was hectic. Just found leaves in my pocket.
You wrote me a letter and I cannot make out anything you wrote except the last sentence which says "tell the wolf ill meet him at sunset and that I'm sorrry"
Fuck buddy has no power. Invited her over to use my shower. I love hurricaines.
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
Well apparently I decided it was easier I piss in the trash can at waffle house than In the toilet. Would've been ok if the trash can was in the bathroom.
He had a small dick anyway. I'm glad I barfed on it.
IT WAS JUST SO LITTLE AND AWKWARDLY FLOPPING BACK AND FORTH
The only words I could make out were "Dicksmash McIroncock".
I'm so hungry and so lazy that I'm seriously considering ripping into that packet of cream cheese in my nightstand.
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
we found her on the beach half naked talking to a palm tree
Which half?
Randomize
