I hate ducks.
What?
they're sketch. like squirrels. squirrels are sketch as fuck.
I don't care. He smelled like a fucking chilli cookoff
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
Just heard this lady walk by on her phone saying "did everyone orgasm?"
Let's just cut to the chase. I'm not interested in anything romantic but I aAM interested in Tom Petty and maybe getting high and fucking you again for old times sake.
There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
sitting alone on a bench with a sombrero and a bottle of vodka. really angry i got here before you guys.
remember how i yelled at you for inviting that coke dealer to the party?! i found the $100 bill they were snorting with in the couch.
..new slutty dresses or booze? i won't even waste time with the i told you so.
there was so much lube in my brother's closet...
if i don't get grease into my system pronto i will undoubtedly die
Not a problem, sailor. I speak both autocorrect and typo.
Tomorrow night, I am putting you In my trunk. No excuses we have waited forever for this.
1 fuck you 2 fuck her 3 ur forgiven 4 im breaking up with her
Was last night real life? Like did you really light your hair on fire
Somehow I don't think offering me edibles is what dad meant by checking in on me
They're the hard candy kind!
Randomize
