we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
Swear. I think after passing out in a community college parking lot I can safely nominate myself for the piece of shit of the year award
just fed a duck at the lake a weed brownie. it hasnt moved in 20 minutes.
She literally thanked me for asking before I put in her ass
When I woke up in the parking lot today I decided it is not a good idea to hang out with you anymore.
There should be a blender full of rum, tea, and grape jelly in the freezer. She thought it was a good idea until she blew chunks.
I NEVER left your party last night of anyone asks.
Yeah, I didn't wake up handcuffed to my bed either.
You remember that guy i fucked in Ireland who stopped in the middle to talk about why he had 8 pillows on his bed? Yeah he's following me on twitter...
you really need to stop getting laid in my dreams more than i do.
So I've decided to grow a vagina forest. Because I'm single and it's like a zen garden. Brings a new meaning to long hair don't care.
I can't thank you enough for the well-timed blowjob. What a huge improvement in my outlook on the day.
being single and having a boyfriend 300 miles away is eerily similar. never skipped a beat eating hot wings in my bed with no pants or masturbating every day.
There is a pool of ranch salad dressing in my purse...I know thats always been something you've wanted to try..so don't even act like you didn't do this.
First you stole a hockey stick out of the nieghbors yard and claimed you were moses leading his children home. Then you led us around the same block twice before I called the cab
Randomize
