cynthia nixon should never get laid more than me
you just broke rule number 1. If you can't lift her up don't date her
She referred to her collection of sex toys as an "arsenal." I'm not sure whether to be scared or excited....
Walmart at night is scary enough without having to run into people you've slept with
Make the kitchen floor stop waving. Im trying to lay on it
Oh please not the Easy Cheese again. That was weird.
Should I tell this TSA agent his fly is down while he is trying to hit on this chick?
When you're not at your house I assumed you're somewhere having sex
I just looked down and realized I was walking around in briefs and a ninja turtle shirt; and for a second, I thought I was 8 again... Weird...
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
I was asked last night if Magnum makes a XXL..... I don't think I've ever broken this many condoms in my life
Please god tell me you aren't pregaming your date alone.
I yelled at your uterus for you.
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
Unless it has to do with ramen, goldfish, cheese, or rugby, don't talk to me.
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