i mistaked the back of her knee for her vagina
there's a booger on my laptop, i suspect it's yours
Whoa! I think of you when I eat cottage cheese.
Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
some guy just pulled a dress out of a fax machine...I have no idea what the hell is going on
but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
Two dudes got up on top of the pianos and danced shirtless. They didnt even get kicked out. I love vegas
I have bruises on my ass from her spurs. God bless Texas.
Just got a picture message from my sister of the two of us wearing cowboy hats and pressing our bare asses together. Do you remember enough to explain?
Just thought you should know that your brother tried to febreeze his floors with cooking spray last night.
and then you looked me right in the eyes and said "i just really wanna pet some horses right now"
The guy I met last night said we had a real connection and gave me his AA coin because he met me during his relapse
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
Randomize
