He literally stopped in the middle of sex to look up sex positions on his iPhone...
Its a bummer that corporate america doesn't believe in $2 u call its on a Sunday night
Needing to keep one leg on the floor during sex so you dont spin should qualify for some kind of drunk award.
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Meh. People are people bro. All of us are hairless psychotic apes. Happy 420.
Nothing says "Good Morning" like Jell-o shots and coffee cakes.
Drove by a cop already pulling someone over and toasted him with my bong
It's 4 in the afternoon........
Well we had to pull over on a side street in town so I could throw up while moms were driving by with car loads of kids, I feel like I just performed a lil silent AA film for the childrens
I was super proud of him for making a mature relationship decision, and then I remembered that he cheated on her. With me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's no discreet way to sneak a cucumber into the shower lol
FUCK YOU AND YOUR WEAK ASS EYEBROWS
I ate so much cake that I can't even enjoy a blowjob
That's the most first world problem I've ever heard in my life.
You were trying to be sexy by spraying your contact solution on your chest and telling me to lick it off
It started getting weird when you decided to scold my vagina.
He adjusted my bra straps while I blew him.
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